I never knew I had a superpower. But apparently I have.
It’s called Chasing Grown Men up the Street, or that’s what my brother calls it.
Now if you saw me you’d think I was lying for sure. I’m only 148 cm, that’s 4 ft 10 on the old scale so you might wonder what business I had chasing grown men anywhere.
Well it’s not like I chased them. I did ask them to leave the party and I explained it nicely about the ageing neighbours and the noise. And so as my brother told it, they literally ran up the street after they were told. So that’s how the myth started.
Well it happened before that actually. It was at my son’s 18th birthday party in the garden at home. He was quite worried about a few things, gatecrashers for one and the fact that I said the party had to be over at 1 am.
“But mum, how are you going to get them to leave? he asked gingerly.
“I’ll just tell them to go. I’ll remind them at 12.30 that they have half an hour left and then 30 minutes later I’ll tell them ‘It’s time to go.”
“But they won’t go. They’ll be drunk. They’ll just ignore you,” he said.
“We’ll see,” I said barely concealing my laugh.
And to be honest, they did go. Right on the dot of 1am, I went downstairs and said “Right, those who are leaving, there’s the gate, those who want taxis, wait here. Those who are staying, up stairs now.”
And that’s exactly what happened. My Super Power.
But I must tell you what happened about the gate crashers.
At about 10 pm a whole pile (I hesitate to use the word gang, but the thought did cross my mind) of very solidly built young men of Island extraction turned up uninvited and unannounced.
My brother, who had come to help me crowd control had already fallen asleep after consuming some random girl’s Jim Beam he was supposed to be looking after. But in a way I was glad. Aggression was the last thing we needed here. I have seen how these things can get out of control.
My son was a tad worried and I have to admit, so was I but I wasn’t letting him know. Or them for that matter. After a hasty discussion it was decided to let them stay as it seemed the better option.
Keeping a very watchful eye from upstairs, I saw the very beginning of an altercation between two of the boys and I sprinted into action.
I stepped right up close to them, touched one on the arm and stretched my head right up to make contact with the other one’s eyes, (it was a long way up) and said in the calmest voice possible, “Is everything alright here boys?”
Visibly shocked, one said, “Yes Mrs Robinson,” and they backed slightly away from each other.
“Well I wouldn’t want any trouble you know.”
“No, no trouble,” the biggest one said.
And it was over. Altercation taken care of.
And the party started again. That’s when I knew for sure I had a Super Power.
It’s good to have a Super Power when you’re a female and only 148 cm tall. In fact it’s brilliant. I use this power often.
It is something I now teach to my clients who want to stop sh#t happening.
Everyone has this power. It really isn’t anything special. It can be learned.
And it has come in real handy when anyone tried to bully me or heaven forbid, attack me. Although my mother used to say quite often, “Pity the poor man who would attack you.” And she was right.
So, do you think if I can make Grown Men Run up the Street without an assault rifle at the ready, that a bully is going to trouble me. You bet they’re not.
I’m BullyProof and I can teach you or anyone else how to be immune to bullies or controllers or how you can become assertive even in dangerous situations.
Stay tuned for my next installment on how I took on a gang, yes a gang of bikies. Alone at 3 am. It’s a ripper.